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Fast & Polyamorous?

Posted: April 24, 2017 14:03:27 • 650 words
New headcanon for the Fast & Furious movies: Whenever there's car racing, it's a metaphor, and what's actually happening is sex ^.^

I tweeted this while re-watching Fast & Furious 6, and the more I thought about it, the more it seemed to fit. So, since I’m currently in a headcold-and-Sudafed-induced haze, I wanted to write it all out.

In this context, the first film is the story of a young guy, Brian, (Paul Walker’s character) who goes undercover into the orgy scene, and he falls for a girl he meets there (Mia, Jordana Brewster’s character). But he’s also in love with her brother, Dom (Vin Diesel’s character). Unfortunately, they have to part ways, but Brian ditches his law enforcement job because he want to join the orgy scene for real.

In the second film, Brian has taken his newfound interests to an extreme, having wild, crazy sex to the exclusion of everything else. The life he abandoned catches up to him, though, and with the help of an old flame (Tyrese Gibson’s character), he manages to find some stability and balance without giving up his fun.

By the 4th film (the third doesn’t count), Brian has returned to law enforcement, but he still enjoys having a frisky and unconventional sex life, playing around whenever he can. He clearly hasn’t gotten over Dom, though, and he spends the whole movie trying to win Dom’s heart. Successfully :)

In the 5th film, Brian, Dom, and Mia are on the run together. Brian and Dom still play in groups, but their circle of partners is getting more intimate, focusing on their closest friends. They assemble a private play group, invite-only, but what Brian really wants is solo time with Dom. And eventually, Dom realizes he wants the same thing, with the film ending on one of their most intimate moments together.

In the 6th film, Brian, Dom, and Mia have formed a solid polycule. Brian and Mia have a fairly conventional hetero relationship, but Brian and Dom play together privately whenever they can. They still play in groups too, when they can (mostly the same group of partners from the 5th film), but even in a group orgy, they have a really special energy together, which makes things more fun for everyone. They’re ready to settle down, though, and by the end of the film, they’ve found the conventional semi-vanilla life they all crave. However, along the way, they find Dom’s former primary partner (Letty, believed to be dead at the end of the 4th film), and even though she can’t remember much, she re-joins Dom as part of Dom, Brian, and Mia’s polycule.

And in the 7th film, domesticity and semi-monogamy is clearly not sitting well with Brian. It’s just not who he is. Through a twist of fate, he and Dom get to go on one more promiscuous adventure together, much like their other recent orgies from the 5th and 6th films. But at the end of it, everyone seems satisfied; Brian, Dom, Mia, and Letty have mostly settled down. And the film ends on Brian and Dom having another solo fling, just the two of them doing what they both love.


Some might consider this to be in poor taste, and while I’ve drastically overthought something that started as a silly little joke, I did so with nothing but affection. Cinematically, the Fast & Furious films have plenty of flaws, but they’re among my all-time favorites. And Paul Walker was my favorite actor; I can’t watch the end of Furious 7 without crying. But, this simple little quip rapidly assembled a lot of parallels to my own experiences and relationships, and I thought this view of the films was sweet & heartwarming, so I wanted to share it. I hope you enjoyed reading it! <3